The hidden cost of high achievement, and how to heal it
What if your crisis had a purpose?
Why talk therapy isn’t always enough.
Why success can still feel empty.
Summary:
In this TBI One Love podcast conversation, Nat explains why willpower and logic often can’t resolve deep patterns of perfectionism, over-responsibility, and people-pleasing.
These patterns live in the subconscious and the body — not just the mind.
She shares how pivotal life events — a breakdown, a breakup, and a profound awakening — became turning points. And how similar crises (accidents, illness, burnout) can act as course corrections, realigning us with our values.
Her approach:
create safety in the nervous system
process stored emotions somatically
work with subconscious parts (inner critic, protector, pleaser)
to resolve root causes — especially for those who have “tried everything else.”
The result: calm, confidence, clarity, and the capacity to embody authentic, purpose-led leadership.
Symptoms become signals, not sentences. Healing becomes an upgrade to how we lead, love, and live.
Key Themes / Takeaways:
High performers are often driven by the learned program: earn love through achievement.
Symptoms are signals: burnout, anxiety, pain, or illness can be invitations to realign.
Talk therapy offers insight, but trauma is stored in the body — it must be felt and released.
95% of behaviour is subconscious: real change requires working below conscious thought (somatics, hypnotherapy, parts work).
Safety first: regulate the nervous system (breath, nature, visualisation) to access deeper healing.
Move from overthinking & doubt to clarity, confidence, and purpose-led leadership.
For women leaders: beware invisible labour, overgiving, and people-pleasing — set boundaries and delegate.